Rebuilding Trust

Taking Responsibility

1. Admit It. If you betrayed someone else, you need to come clean. In interpersonal relationships, it’s especially important to tell the truth when you would benefit from a lie. If you betrayed someone, coming clean at your own expense tells the other person that their well-being is more important than your own.Denial will only make the other party's distrust run deeper, especially if the truth is already clear.

   
   • Admit all of your mistakes. Even if there are parts that you can keep hidden without getting caught, you should still reveal them to the other person. Only in admitting all your mistakes can you be forgiven for all of them.

   
   
   
2. Get Ready For A Reaction: Admitting that you betrayed someone is not going to make things easier immediately.On the contrary, you can expect an emotional outburst—yelling, crying, and so on—from the other person when she hears you admit your betrayal. But remember, the best way to move on is by putting it all into the open.

1. Apologize. This one should be obvious, but unfortunately, sometimes it gets overlooked. How you approach saying your apology will influence whether or not the apology is accepted and you both can move on.
   
   • The best way to accept responsibility is by recognizing the other person’s hurt, saying what you should have done instead, and doing that behavior in the future.
   • Let the person you betrayed know why you are apologizing. If they know that you are apologizing out of guilt and shame, they are more likely to forgive you. If they think that you are apologizing out of pity, they are less likely to forgive you. Pity, unlike guilt and shame, does not show an element of personal responsibility of the offender. . 

   
   

   By: Casidy Summers