- Think about the situation. Why are you fighting? This is an important first step—your apology will seem pointless if you can't explain what you are apologizing for, and may lead to making the fight worse.
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Talk to her/him. Tell them how you feel about what happened. Tell them that you want to be friends again, and point out certain things that you miss about them. If necessary show your emotions by crying or hugging.
- Even under the worst of circumstances an honest face to face conversation may be all that is needed to reestablish a bond.
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Take the initiative. Be open about wanting to fix your friendship. Friends should not play (mind) games with each other. If you truly love this person and want them to stay your friend, be open about your feelings towards them.
- Say you are sorry.
You have to mean it however; the person will be able to tell if you're
being sincere or not. It's the best word to use to explain your
feelings. Leave it as a message on their answering machine if they have
not answered your phone calls.
- Say you are sorry.
You have to mean it however; the person will be able to tell if you're
being sincere or not. It's the best word to use to explain your
feelings. Leave it as a message on their answering machine if they have
not answered your phone calls.
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Be calm and open to what your friend is saying. Getting defensive will cause your friend to do the same, which will make it hard for the two of you to work things out.
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Create an open discussion. When possible, and if the other friend agrees, try to sit down for coffee or something with them and talk things out. Wait at least three days to do this because the person will probably still be upset if earlier. It really depends though on how intense the fight was. When your friend speaks, listen. Be sincere in the things you have to say. Your friend will know if you are being insincere.
- Speak quietly and from the heart. Allow them to feel the pain that
you feel, and the loneliness you have endured since the break up of the
friendship.
- Explain how much you value and miss their friendship, and that you would like to speak to them in person.
- Crack a Joke. Friends love jokes. Jokes are fun. Life should be fun.
Life's not a whole lot without your good friend there. When the tension
starts to ease, and you get details out of the way, lighten the mood.
Be careful though. Do not make a joke referring to the fight..ever. This
can be seen as offensive and as if you did not take the person
seriously.
- Speak quietly and from the heart. Allow them to feel the pain that
you feel, and the loneliness you have endured since the break up of the
friendship.
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Step into their shoes. Try to sit back and see another perspective besides your own. This is a situation where one needs to think critically. It's not simple to try to understand other people. Think about recent events that have gone on in your friend's life. Try to understand the reason that your relationship got to such a heated level.
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Learn from what happened. Never regret it, because in life you learn and grow stronger from mistakes you have made and problems you have gone through.
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Show him/her that you are sorry. This goes beyond the conversation that the two of you have. Whether or not they choose to forgive you, show your friend that you did not want to hurt him/her, and that you truly regret whatever you did. Go out of your way to put their needs in front of yours until you feel that things are on the mend.
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Gradually repair your friendship. Start talking to them more and more, don't go for the whole thing at once.
Taking Responsibility
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Admit It. If you betrayed someone else, you need to come clean. In interpersonal relationships, it’s especially important to tell the truth when you would benefit from a lie. If you betrayed someone, coming clean at your own expense tells the other person that their well-being is more important than your own.Denial will only make the other party's distrust run deeper, especially if the truth is already clear.
- Admit all of your mistakes. Even if there are parts that you can keep hidden without getting caught, you should still reveal them to the other person. Only in admitting all your mistakes can you be forgiven for all of them.
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Get Ready For A Reaction: Admitting that you betrayed someone is not going to make things easier immediately.On the contrary, you can expect an emotional outburst—yelling, crying, and so on—from the other person when she hears you admit your betrayal. But remember, the best way to move on is by putting it all into the open.
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Apologize. This one should be obvious, but unfortunately, sometimes it gets overlooked. How you approach saying your apology will influence whether or not the apology is accepted and you both can move on.
- The best way to accept responsibility is by recognizing the other person’s hurt, saying what you should have done instead, and doing that behavior in the future.
- Let the person you betrayed know why you are apologizing. If they know that you are apologizing out of guilt and shame, they are more likely to forgive you. If they think that you are apologizing out of pity, they are less likely to forgive you. Pity, unlike guilt and shame, does not show an element of personal responsibility of the offender. .
By: Casidy Summers
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